I'm a Slob

Here's a fun fact about me: I'm kind of a slob.

I'm one of those people that constantly puts off cleaning until everything is an overwhelming disaster, then puts it off even longer because the thought of cleaning up a mess of such heart-stoppingly immense scale is enough to induce a a fit of the Victorian-era-style vapours. When things become unlivable, I clean nonstop for several days, vow to keep my apartment tidy from now on... and then immediately fail to do so. Rinse. Repeat.

I am currently unable to cook because of the insane level of mess in my kitchen, so now seemed like a good time to post a little instructable about cleaning kitchens I made for class. 

Here it is:

Meet the Parents

You know what I love about my parents besides the fact that they raised me to adulthood without major incident? Whenever I go to their house, they send me home with food. And I made out pretty good last weekend when my boyfriend and I went over there for the dreaded meet-the-parents dinner. 

Results: They like him! And I get to put on grocery shopping for a few more days. 

My parents have been trying out this service called Blue Apron. Basically, you pay Blue Apron and, a few times a week, Blue Apron sends you a recipe and the ingredients you need to make it, all measured out for you and ready to go. The only things you need to bring to the table are salt, pepper, olive oil, and the ability to follow directions. 

So, my parents sent me home with a few of the Blue Apron meals they hadn't gotten around to making yet and I gave it a go. 

Mexican Chicken Mole with Lime-Cilantro Rice

I took everything out of the bag and here's what it looked like:

 

Pretty neat, huh? I could get used to this. They really do include everything. On the flip side, my mom claims that this stuff had been in the fridge for, like, two weeks by this point. Everything still looked and smelled absolutely fresh, which is a little weird. But who am I to complain? FREE FOOD.

 
 Anyway, all I had to do was chop everything up and follow the directions.... and viola! Food.

They even included directions about how to garnish the plate. No kidding. Looks pretty delicious, if I do say so myself (and I do say so myself). 

My boyfriend and I sat down to enjoy our meal, and, I have to be honest, ew. Just... ew. To be fair, the chicken part was pretty good. I won't say it was amazing, but it was good. The rice, on the other hand, was unholy.

My boyfriend kept trying to compliment me on the food because he's polite, but I just kept trying to give all the credit to Blue Apron because I didn't want the responsibility for that disgusting rice on my conscience.

The recipe called for 2 tsp. lime zest (the whole peel). While the zest certainly made the rice look fancy, it made the rice taste like soap scum. I have to say, I resent Blue Apron for making me peel that lime. It took me probably 10 solid minutes to do it, and, in the end, all it did was ruin a perfectly good side dish. All in all, not my favorite dish I've ever cooked.

But on the other hand, I made cookies! And cookies are never a mistake. 

I used this recipe and put in milk chocolate chips. It may actually be, as the link says, the best chocolate chip cookie ever.

The only thing I would add is that baking them at 325 degrees for 10-12 minutes isn't really enough. I like an underdone cookie, but those cooking directions make for a just-barely-melted cookie. 12 minutes at 350 degrees is just about perfect.

They were supposed to be guilt cookies (side note: cookies are a great manipulation tactic), but they never made it out of the apartment. We ate them all. I don't even regret it. They were some damn fine cookies.